Wednesday, July 2, 2014

Lessons of Love

Today I feel prompted to write a little something about my dad. He would probably be embarassed that I'm writing this (he's not one to like the spotlight) and he would likely argue what I'm about to say, but I'm writing it anyway.

Lately I've been really touched by his love and devotion to my mom. There are certainly days where he feels absolutely frustrated with her, and I'm not going to say he doesn't ever lose his patience. Live a day in his shoes and patience will bring on a whole new meaning! But I can see and feel, in all of the little things that he does and says, just how much he loves my mom. Some of these things are a little personal to share, but here are a couple of examples to demonstrate his true love for my mom.

He takes her to Bath & Body Works. If you are a regular reader, you know what a chore this is. Furthermore, mom has lost her concept of money so an average trip to Bath & Body Works will cost my dad at least $100. She likes to do this at least every other month. I once asked him why he keeps taking her, arguing that he's wasting too much money at that place. His reply?

"It's just money. If that's what makes her happy then I'll take her. I figure there isn't much left that she enjoys, so whatever makes her happy."

It's the same answer when he gives in to taking her to Sam's Club or to Kohl's or anywhere. He doesn't have to do it. She doesn't need (or even use) most of what she buys. It would be much easier to go by himself or put her off. And as much as he wants to, he always gives in and takes her. Why? It is a true act of love that drives him to do it.

Right now, my parents are on [what will likely be] their final vacation to Utah. I warned my dad against going alone and taking her to Utah; she's very difficult to take out anymore. On their trip last year, mom wanted to visit the relatives she remembered and after 10 minutes of visiting with each of them, she was ready to retire to her trailer. Why go through all of that hassle, spend the money and the time to drive 12 hours, out of state hauling their fifth wheel camper? The answer to me is clear. LOVE. My dad truly loves my mom. He isn't taking this trip for himself (I know he'd love more than anything to take a day of fishing for himself), he is doing this purely for her. We don't know what tomorrow brings...everyday she forgets more and more and pieces of her life and the people she once knew. But for today, she wants to take her trip to Utah. And so my dad does what he can to make my mom happy. He doesn't think he's doing anything extraordinary, but I am touched and inspired by his example of love and devotion to my mom. She is truly blessed to have him as her companion.


  1. Funny I was thinking about the same thing this morning when I was driving to work.

  2. Okay. Let me try this again!! Their visit to Provo was a wonderful experience for both Cynthia and Patty. Cynthia says your dad surely has a reserved place in the celestial kingdom. Truth is— so does your mother. Of that I have no doubt. Now leave me alone while I cry......

  3. We could not ask for a better man to care for our sister in her time of need.

  4. I often notice these things and think about how much Dad loves Mom. He's such an example to me.